Tame the savageness of man and make gentle the life of this world.

It all begins with intention…. 

Once I saw a room full of people and I saw the hues of their intentions and wished we all could be seen this way from a distance.

In all societies around the world, we share many core values of positive intention. In all the major religions and philosophies, in politics, law, etiquette, family norms, in all people, of all ages there is admired and scorned behavior.

We also are all labeled based on shared genetics and culture that came from having families in the same area from physical necessity, sharing food, land and language and then protecting ourselves, our children and grandchildren. The groups who protected their children best survived. Identifying difference is identified risk, so people who were more like ourselves were safer than people that didn’t. This meant noticing tiny details and fearing differences served our survival. Labels were based on how we identify “the other”, the less safe, the less important group. Being a different color, for example, was not the "problem", it was simply a faster way, a more likely way of identifying "not one of us", therefore potentially competitive or dangerous. Notice "Black Lives Matter" is not about saving people in Ethiopia. "Arian Nation" is not to benefit a blue-eyed Iraqi Muslim. Russians are killing Russians in Ukraine. Chinese are killing Chinese in Tibet. Christians went to war as Protestants vs. Catholics. "Northerners" fought "Southerners" in the United States.

Inside the primal driven groupings, there is diversity in appearance and behavior tendencies due to life itself benefiting from changes in each generation to increase success in a changing environment. Therefore, every large group of people has a range of kindness, patience, tolerance and hostility, dominance, selfishness. So, any label or group you choose for humans, there are members in that group who prioritize kindness more than other members or are more hostile than other members of that same group. “Caucasian” includes empathetic people and cruel people, as does “Asian”, “Peruvian”, “Rich”, “European”, “Californian”, “Muslim”, and so on. 

People are more consistently alike in occupations due to their having more choice than where they are born and the culture of their parents. Choosing to be a monk is a better predictor about a person than knowing they are "white". Yet, even among professions, the profession does not absolutely inform you about the ethics of the individual. A police officer could be someone who’s life is dedicated to the protection and service to the public or they could be corrupt and abusive. 

The title nor the labels we are born with give us any surety about their intentions. So, we also then respond to behavior with punishment and imprisonment, grouping by “law-abiding” and “criminal”, documented or undocumented immigrant, always in search for a way of defining “safe” and “unsafe”, not much differently that a sniff from a dog for familiarity bringing the wag of a tail or a bark, not even realizing our own bark may define the “other” person’s reaction to us, so our initiating behavior may confirm our pre-existing bias based on an irrational response to risk like any animal.

During deep thought over my lifetime about human challenges, I discovered that it is actually conscious intention that defines who we are. 

We like people who are well-meaning for our own existence. 

We come to the feeling of “knowing” someone considering their values and their actions follow their intentions, thereby creating or destroying Trust. Our words only follow our intentions if we are honest, which is a chosen intention - to be honest. Our actions follow our honest intentions with a decision to act through inspiration, hope, desire, decision, duty, honor, courage, fortitude, determination, perseverance and grit. 

Language is filled with words to capture our state of mind. They are celebrated or scorned depending on their benefit to ourselves, others, as groups, as a society, or as humans on Earth. Our intention may be to create good Karma, to be admitted into Heaven, to make our parents proud, to serve a cause, to serve others or to serve only ourselves in our lifetimes. If you learn that I wish harm upon others and am willing to lie to only serve myself personally, you will lose respect for me and I will likely lose your friendship. If you believe in my intentions, see only my good actions, you will disagree in my assessment with someone who experiences me differently.

You likely agree with these truths without comparing this author's appearance with yours or our ancestry or religion. As you read, most people consider the meaning, in the context of their pre-existing conditioning about ideas, rather than anyone's appearance potentially labeling them as different.

When a person shares their intention and does not deliver, we are disappointed since they created in us an expectation and we held them in a state of trust, which failed. It is a worse experience for us than never providing the trust in the first place. 

However, while our disappointment persists, we pause before judgment to take circumstances into consideration. If our mother is late to pick us up from school because she chose to watch videos rather than if she slipped and broke her leg changes our reaction to her not arriving on time. The physical harm to us is the same, but if she broke her leg, we continue to trust her intentions. We will admire her until we learn we do not approve of her intentions.  If her actions seem to not be based on her intentions, we should not question the importance of intentions, we should question her honesty about her intentions.

Now we find ourselves in a society with global relationships, with an Internet, jet planes, and mobility. In the near future, we may be experiencing life in a virtual environment where physical traits and location are unimportant in our relationships. 

However, despite these recent changes, our minds and conditioning still has us clinging to the familiar face or plot of land as a way to distinguish “us” from “other”. 

Seven billion people and there does not appear to be a label for the people you’d enjoy having over for dinner. Personally, there are some people I simply would not want to step into my house for any reason, ever. And there are millions of people on both sides of a war who would otherwise be friends. 

If the friends on both sides were in power, there would not be a war.

Let us try on a label for our good intentions. Philotimo.